Monday, September 3, 2012

Knock Knock Jokes: Foreign Countries Edition, With Sheep


SCOTLAND
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Fiona.
Fiona who?
Fiona of the Ford truck with three sheep in the front seat, your headlights are on. Fiona of the Ford truck…

ENGLAND
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Angus.
Angus who?
Angus for a sheep or a lamb—I never understood that saying! I don’t want anyone to hang me at all! Especially not for a sheep! Or a lamb! A pig, well, maybe a pig. Or a sheep that looks like a pig.

ENGLAND
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Aldous.
Aldous who?
Aldous put on a little aftershave and we’ll go see about that pig, what!

IRELAND
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Seamus.
Seamus who?
Seamus one time and it’s fool on...no, hold on...Seamus two times and you fool...no...okay my name’s not Seamus. 

WALES
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Llwllvqtrwlll.
Llwllvqtrwlll who?
Llwllvqtrwlll the bathtub, I’m dwowning!

FRANCE
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Pierre.
Pierre who?
Pierre, pee there, no problem—Llwllvqtrwlll is here! 

NORWAY
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Olaf.
Olaf who?
Olaf if you must, but I’m telling you, there are five guys outside with giant horns on their heads and their faces all stinky with fish—I am not answering that door!

MEXICO
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Jesus.
Jesus like in jee-zuz, or like in hay-soos?
Dude, it says I’m from Mexico. 
Oh, yeah, sorry. Uh, Jesus who?
Jesus, don’t be afraid, take a sad song, and make it beh-eh-eh-ter...



3 comments:

  1. I'm smiling out loud...is there an acronym for that?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well there should be, damn it.

    ReplyDelete